>> Thursday, September 9, 2010
With Kindergarten starting tomorrow I drug my very reluctant 5 year old out to get his hair cut. When we walked into the local Perfect look I was shocked to see who would be taking scissors to my son, I almost turn tail and ran out the door mumbling something about looking for the post office.
This young gal working at Perfect look had a far from Perfect look, she had metal sticking out all over her face, sporting one of them bull like rings through her nose and metal studs in her cheeks where dimples would be if she hadn't killed them. She also had tattoos running up her arms and crazy multi colored hair. Not wanting to be judgmental and look un-cool, I gave her a big smiled and let her know Sam would be getting a trim, my smile was not returned, I guess the face jewelry makes smiling difficult.
“Mom that lady is creepy,” Sam whispers to me as we follow her back to the chair, Yes, I thought, Yes she is.
Living near and working in Portland most of my life I’m not put off by lots of pricings and tattoos, Portland is famous for being “Weird” after all.
I have 6 pricings *in my ears folks, ears!* and a tattoo myself, I’ve even always wanted to get my nosed priced, so who am I to cast stones. But I couldn’t help think if you’re going to be working with the public you should probably try and avoid scaring the crap out of small children, hell she scared me.
I know I’m getting old because I really wanted to tell her, “You have such a pretty face why did you want to mess it up with all that metal.” But I kept my mouth shut and just kept smiling like a moron.
As she was working on Sam’s hair, he sat trying to avoid looking at her for fear she would give him the Weegee stare and kill him. I, on the other hand could not help staring at her...I noticed the area around her cheek impalements looked raw and sore and you could see into the hole in her face. This made me think what having holes in your face would be like.
Having a Swiss cheese face can’t be easy, think of all the things you can’t do, like whistle or blow bubbles with chewing gum, could you even suck a milkshake though a straw. *OMG I'd die before giving up milkshakes* You couldn’t blow up a balloon; you might shoot one of them studs out of your face and hurt someone.
And what about leakage? Would you wake up in the morning with drool running out of your face holes?
You can’t be a happy person if the simple act of smiling and laughing cause’s pain or do you think punching holes through your face muscles makes you smileplegic?
She didn’t smile the entire time she cut Sam’s hair, in the end she completely messed it up, when I asked her to take more off the top... she took more off the back. I was too afraid to ask her to fix it, tipped her four bucks and took my little Dorothy Hamill home. When my husband told me to take him back and have them fix his “dorkcut” I told him I couldn’t because I was scared she would use him in a Wicken sacrifice or something.